Crystal Syben Haidl is not quite the intellect, but more like a not- so-closeted nerd embodying a grassroots sensuality. She admits her consciousness was complexly shaped in youth by 70s era social sitcoms, strict Catholic school flower-power flavored discipline, public high school "journaling", conservative European social-democrat working class parentage, and a rebellious vegetarianism, along with a smattering of Hesse, Chaucer, Voltaire, Wuthering Heights, Laban and funk.

She's a mother, has been a wife; a lover many times over. She's scrubbed thousands of toilets with the same hands shaken with politicians, pointed fingers at anatagonists and cuddled babies. She's been an employer, a stripper, won a full tuition scholarship to UCLA and received a state government commendation for pro-consumer business stances. She's been homeless, jobless, housed by friends and family who supported her, even as they shook their heads.